I hope it continues for both of you for As long as he's 18 he can do whatever he wants. so maybe it's for the best? So I'm not sure what you're complaining about. The research summarized in a BBC review, suggests this is caused by biology, not lifestyle. It requires maturity and equanimity to consistently set limits but not excessive ones, remain calm, and collaboratively solve problems with your child. Why? I'm guessing the biggest problem here is your parents, not you. please give me your input, you are the most competent here to understand both me and this man of 'mine'. And in 1.6% of marriages, the man is at least 10 years younger. So a man with a high sex drive in his early years won't be a good match for most women in their 40's and 50's. My family is accepting but his family has always been close minded. After three months of secret dating, we told my parents. Should you make such a major life decision based on some narrow-minded people's definition of normalcy? Hold up the poster child of Aston Kirshner and Demi Moore all you want. I often find the people saying age is just a number to be somewhat frilly nilly. Add God and you have a trifecta. So it is best to truly do what makes you happy. … One couple, whom I know and I'm friends with the man of the pair, sees a 17 year age gap. It is not that strange at all . If he is an adult, then he knows what he is doing. So, on average, a man choosing a woman five years older is marrying his physiological equal. Allowing love means when he checks on your car, you let him. That conflict can make for tough times. So how can women find younger men? Well, a man with intelligence would choose the latter, always. Marrying an older woman may even yield health benefits fairly early in a marriage. What matters is love.where there's love no fear. whatever the case you wanted a new mother, and of course, when the pupil is ready there will come the teacher. "It may be worth resisting the attraction to younger ones.". Yes you can marry a young lady that is 3 years older than you … What I’ve seen, in the few cases, and regardless of the push back and vitriol coming from here, is that most women won’t marry a man with a significantly younger age gap, nor will most younger men marry a woman with a significantly older age gap. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think age-gap couples are kidding themselves when they try to say their just like traditional age couples. Just doesn’t happen. There is no drawback to it. Why is it good to marry an older woman? Presently, over half of men age 24 and under still reside solely with their parents. 2) Women age faster than men. If he's married to a 60 year-old woman, he's married to someone who, on average, is physiologically ten years younger and thus likely healthier and more vigorous, physically and mentally. Maturity in the relationship. your new mother took you in her house and her heart. For many people, the difference in fertility rate is too small to trump the factors cited above. Even still, his oldest child is 18 and even she doesnt think it appropriate her father date me. Your opinion doesn't work for them. Francis Nmeribe helps people who desire a joyful relationship in their dating, courtship and marriage relationships. i am a lady of 70 and he is a stunner of 40. he says he fell in love with my personality, my brains and knowledge, that is. At age 80, the average man is moribund or dead. I know because I am in a relationship with a guy 22yrs younger than I am. What I'm trying to say is, people may tell you something is wrong, but God may tell you it's right and he wants it for you. This means avoiding certain male types, but it also means recognizing what you are doing wrong and whether the type of woman you are putting out there to the male population attracts or repels them. Or close in age? In Sudan he can even marry a goat, but I doubt he's going to find one that's 4 years older than him. Nothing exposes repressed misogyny like the issue of older women being with younger men. A lot of people are very conventional in their thinking. so its not advisable for younger man older woman alliance..lets be practical with men please.. Why not? "I'm getting married to a … As long as he's 18 he can do whatever he wants. So marrying an older woman, on average, not only increases the chances she'll contribute more money to the family income, she'll be in a better position to offer career advice and maybe even help her husband land a better job. Marriage generally improves life expectancy, but the age gap between a couple affects the life expectancy of men and women very differently. david is also a communist, while i am not at all. HE CLEARLY STATES IT. This fantasy of younger men marrying older women in droves is a stretch proliferated by disconnected and debased Hollywood celebrities, the media, and old “you go gurl” types. "Albert is more 'old school' in terms of … I had my child w a woman who was 16 years older than me, but I'm not religious and I see no point in marriage. Good god, man, men don't always marry or have a girlfriend for procreation! What you have was built on friendship and respect. Is it better to waste your time in arguing with an immature girl or would it be better to lie down peacefully on the lap of a mature woman? In contrast, if he had married someone five years older than him, they're more likely to be health peers and to fade away together. Older women are attractive on both physical and intellectual levels. so do you think i should have let him his way that night, or i did it right. They love natural women. I’ve also seen firsthand other younger men who finally grow up, and realize they want to father a child, or they’ve seen the ugly face of the control and dominance, or the even uglier face of the older woman’s problematic and parasitic adult children. Where Is This Going? All that is count in a true wedding is love and nothingelse...Go ahead. But even more so, you should realize that he probably has hope too. My interest in sex near age 60 matches my wife's interest in sex when she was 25 and wanted to have kids. do parents usually have objections to this type of relationship? There would be less financial burden at those ages, if you could find a woman with a job and that knows how to save and is not rapt up in consumerism. I think you're too hung up on detailed age rules. I'm talking about long-term and very significant lack of desire that's not really the fault of anyone except biology. Sure he can, it does not matter what the age difference is. Sometimes, she guided me to making better decisions, like the time I thought I wanted to be more of a grown-up and smoke like her and my mom. Sure, and hold up your typical marriage between people who are close in age, and what happens on the average? Which is obsurd to me. "The Case for Women Marrying an Older Man: Actually, he's not at all blind to his own bias. Marrying an older woman was the best thing I ever did. Women just keep getting better at head games the older they get, their maturity peaks before pubity, then degrades til 14, then stays there until 65, then they get smart again. You and his parents close in age? Why might that matter? Having lived longer, a person is more likely to have maturity that comes with age: not to fight so much about trivia, not as likely to have an affair having gotten that out of her system. I was 22 and she was 54. so he now disappeared and i am not sure if this is because he lost interest or is embarrassed because he got a rejection from a woman 30 years his senior. sorry to reveal to you the truth. After all, they have to show off their beautiful, young wife. age is a number....dont worry You need to understand that older women have so much to offer younger men, it is so far from being a one way street. No where does the Bible prohibit marrying an older woman. No makeup, no problem. I am 52 and he is 30 also we have different religious backgrounds but that's not an issue either. go ahead We remember famous Hollywood pairings like Demi Moore and her 16-years-younger husband Aston Kutcher. And some are easily 10 years older than their actual age, especially if they are overweight, smoke, drink, don't exercise, and eat crap. I know two couples with age differences of 17 and 20 years. How did they react to you being so close to their age? Perhaps you didn't read the article carefully? My husband is 19 years younger, we have been married 11 years and its been wonderful !! "I've never felt like I was in a relationship of equals." Scandalous things can suck, but so does keeping secrets. I knew in my heart that marrying my husband was a good fit. Maturity in parenting. I'm 42 and my wife is 74. Doesnt matter if a woman is 30 and the man is 60. no love and no man could make me religious and/or a smoker, because i am a woman. i actually did, but david was of a bad character or too hurt by his ex wife to love another woman. Psychology Today © 2021 Sussex Publishers, LLC, The Complex Reasons Why Some Refuse to Wear a Mask, COVID-19’s Impact on Mental Health Hasn't Been All Bad. 10 Types of Women That Men Do Not Want to Marry If you are a woman and you want to get married, you need to be smart about your dating. Alfred Kinsey's classic work on sexuality concluded that men's sexual hormones peak at 18, women's in their early 30s. How did his friends react to you when you first met them? I know of 3 couples who've all been married for over ten years, one couple for twenty years and they all consist of younger men and older women. Of course, factors other than hormones affect sexuality, for example, being experienced at sex, but a man increases his chances of sexual compatibility by marrying an older woman. Note that only Adam was formed first and Eve then. There will even be a time when everyone will think she's your mother! I don't think they would have liked any woman he married. It makes people bitter when they feel they followed the rules and they are not happy. Earlier on life's conveyor belt, the typical 65-year-old man has at least one significant health issue. Yes. Of course. as for your story, my take or understanding of it is that you had been rejected by your parents, that is by your mother. When my parents kicked me out of the house, she took me in...under one condition. love her kids Age is nothing bt a number. So this presumltion makes sense i guess. No offense. Can it work between an older woman and a younger man? In my late teens, I was out of control, uneducated, and had no direction. Sexual compatibility. At first it wasn't romantic. i must admit you were clever, with one hit you killed two flies, you found a new mother for yourself, and one who you will make love too simultaneously. I know a couple where the woman is 10 years older, and they've been married for about 40 years. I base this opinion of the age of 13 being the average age for puburty in women and in men, a 13 year old can technically get pregnant or get someone pregnant, therefore i feel 12 years older or younger is the cap on an age difference for me. Please advise, coz am inlove with a women with kids and 2 yrs my senior. What Does a Narcissist Reflect Back to You About Yourself? Married for decades and doing just fine. First of all, 5 years isn't that big of a difference. Yes, you should have hope. How did that end up. Its refreshing to see an article like this durring a time period where pubescent girls are used in sexualy provocative advertising. Marrying an older woman or much older man proved the most detrimental to reproductive success. Little by little, she changed me for the better. For a non-smoker, learning to enjoy kissing a heavy smoker is an acquired taste. I am so happy for you. We still make love with the lights on. The only people who are unhappy are the people complaining about them. I will admit I'm biased: My wife is five years older than I am and we've been contentedly together for 46 years now. We both have the same likes and dislikes and we have been told that we were meant for each other and a sexual match, which is quite important. Likely to be further in her career. It's really your parents' problem, not yours. Mainly it's a visceral, physical thing although some men may value a younger woman because she is more likely to look up to him if only because he may have advanced more in his career. I also in same problem...my parents n he's parents making so many prblm because of this...we just 4 years different ony .... Can a man marry a woman 4 years older than him. david smokes and drinks alcohol too. Younger man in love with a woman 20 years older, I’m a younger man who has a love story with an older woman. Its totally not OK to marry a woman who is your mate or who is older unless you are ready to bear the consequences. She had already been there and done things I was just experiencing for the first time. But if you're trying to say it's only Hollywood, you're wrong. So did everyone else we told. I would love to hear a Chinese womans opinion, especially if your 27 and keep in mind that the guy is 22 and comes from a wealthy land family from an extended family of powerful agriculturalists. And so to whatever extent these men and women had genetically influenced personal qualities that made them favor such a relationship, those qualities are pruned from the gene pool. "But I'd like to have children and older women are less fertile." And, of course, women your own age can vary greatly, but you have the best chance at connecting with them than any other age range. What I’ve seen, in the few cases, and regardless of the push back and vitriol coming from here, is that most women won’t marry a man with a significantly younger age gap, nor will most younger men marry a woman with a significantly older age gap. And I really love her, need help! That changed when my mother's best friend took an interest in me. In fact, as argued above, there's reason to believe you'll be happier with an older woman. No muss, no fuss. He is a very nice guy, I like him a lot and I started meeting him often. Older men appreciate a woman for what she is – every last curve, crevice, and fold. And I know of a couple where the woman is 17 years older, and they've been married almost as long. You've proven it with how your small sample of such marriages differs completely from the 3 marriages I know of. People can be so cruel and judgemental about somebody else's life. And you need to know, that your guy knows this as well. I enjoy my marriage now, but I have to say I have a lot of fond memories about our early years, because it was a coming of age thing for me...and for her, learning to deal with my reactions to new experiences. Most important in choosing a wife, of course is compatibility: sexually, interpersonally, in values, plus whether they're kind, ethical, and, of course, that you love each other: You feel great just being in a room with that person, you put each other on a pedestal, and are pleased to do things for that person. he had called me on the telephone two days later and we quarreled as usually. If the younger party in question is below that age, walk away. I'm 58 and my girlfriend is 8 years younger than me, which doesn't seem like much of a difference physically... ...Of course, that depends on the health and biological age of the people. Can it work between older woman and younger man by 20 years? "But people will think less of me." My ex is 2 years younger, but looks older than me. women don't get brainwashed by love. In 7.4% of marriages, the woman is at least 10 years younger. I’ve seen some younger men that do, they’re incredibly immature, and the older woman invariably will dominate and boss them. If two people are committed to each other that is the most crucial thing. Once the cat was out of the bag, we began dating secretly, but we held off on sex, because she didn't believe in premarital sex. 'god' forbid!!! I like the math method myself. If you'd feel more comfortable growing old with someone in similar shape to you, consider an older woman. Women live five years longer than men, and men die earlier of nine of the top ten leading causes of death. Most of them don't even last 13 years. Are you and his parents the same age? Love does not ask for age...fortunately and love knows no bounds. But after over 20 years of marriage, I can't imaging myself being with a woman my age or one who doesn't smoke. Not so well. But we prefer it because if the woman is older than the man, there is a possiblity of dominating him because of being older than him. now i am waiting to see him by chance once again and tell him that my regret is not that i rejected him but that he didn't even kiss me that night of revelation. Up to that point, we had never kissed, held hands and of course we had never had sex. Keep your expectations of emotional maturity real and don't over estimate it. Just doesn’t happen. This fantasy of younger men marrying older women in droves is a stretch proliferated by disconnected and debased Hollywood celebrities, the media, and old “you go gurl” types. Life is good! So, for example, anecdotally I've observed that more women than men ages 35 to 40 want to do do extreme sports such as rock climbing, run marathons, or do triathlons. women always have a respect for their beloved...younger or elder Older women are seen as more experienced, wise, and calm. Some women love the idea of dating an older man, and others dream of a man that can keep their hearts young and alive in a relationship. i was falling in love and i suffer when i am in love without being with the man i love. But that doesn't make the assertion "nonsense." Marty Nemko, Ph.D., is a career and personal coach based in Oakland, California, and the author of 10 books. If the woman is around age when her biological clocks are ticking, she will force the young bloke to start a family and it will end in tears. Many times this is why a woman will choose to date an older man--their lifestyles and maturity levels may be more matched. At 19 years old, I was an alcoholic, a drug user, a high school drop out, unemployed, and I was an atheist. Today, thanks to prenatal screening, most women have a high probability of having a healthy baby through their 30s and even early 40s. She was 32 years my senior, a holy-roller church lady who didn't drink or party. And how dud his friends react.i have a similar situation but only 15 yrs difference. and then they they, in your mind she, threw you out of her house and heart altogether. I was to follow her rules. So, if I'm...60, and ...he's 38, things might work. Does the Color Red Hold the Secret to Attraction? My husband happens to be 11 years my senior. But a general one you missed would apply to many men with a high sex drive, and is a major reason people come to sex therapy. I am 29-years old and recently met a man and started dating him. I'm working hard and making good money. A couple with a … The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly. But for a man to marry a woman who is 5 years older than him, is that inappropriate? One couple sees a 20 year age gap. Heck, as I can personally attest, even men like myself in his late 50's with a very high sex drive is having a very difficult situation with my wife in her early 50's with a much reduced sex drive. If they are that age or older, possibilities exist.
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